Jeer and Cheers

At the end of March Boston pitcher John Lackey made some headlines.

Here's a portion of the March 27th Boston Globe article:

“Guys having a beer after their start has been going on for the last 100 years,’’ Lackey said. “This is retarded. It’s not like we were sitting up there doing it every night. It’s not even close to what people think.’’

That didn't sit well with me.  So I went to the Red Sox Fan Feedback page and sent them my thoughts:.

Greetings,

The recent comments by John Lackey about "chicken and beer in the clubhouse thing" being "retarded" has me a bit upset and disappointed.

I'm sure that Mr. Lackey could have used a better word to describe the "clubhouse thing" and I would encourage him to visit http://r-word.org and pledge to eliminate the demeaning use of the R-word.

My daughter has Down syndrome and is clinically mentally retarded. She is anything but that. She is bright, playful, humorous, intelligent, and likes to watch baseball, either on television or at the local AA stadium.

She's too young to know that Mr. Lackey's comment is hurtful, but I'm old enough to know. I would hope that Mr. Lackey is, as well.

The Boston Red Sox have a great history and tradition. I don't want to see it crumble, even in the slightest, over Mr. Lackey's comment.

I wish the Red Sox the best in the upcoming season.

Regards,
Mark Aubrey
father and defender of Caroline

Later that day the Boston Globe reported:

The team's media relations department issued the following statement from Lackey: "I apologize for my thoughtless choice of words that appeared in print earlier today. I meant no harm, and I am sorry to all I offended."

This afternoon I received an email from the Red Sox:

Thanks for writing to the Red Sox and I apologize for the delayed response. We make it our goal to personally respond to every piece of mail that we receive.

There were a number of calls and emails from Red Sox Nation fans who were disappointed with John Lackey’s choice of words during a recent interview. Please know that your voice is being heard and that the Red Sox do not condone the use of words that discriminate or put down any one or group of people – especially those who are in most need of our support.

John Lackey realized his error and issued a statement. In that statement, he apologized for his ”thoughtless choice of words” saying he meant no harm, and apologized to all he may have offended.

Again, thanks for writing, and sharing your feelings. Your thoughts and views remain important to us. We will share your sentiments with the leaders of our organization, as well as with John. In the meantime, we hope you enjoy this 100th Anniversary Season of the Red Sox at Fenway Park.

Sincerely,

Phil Derick
Fenway Ambassador
Boston Red Sox

That day, almost two weeks ago, wasn't great, but it turned out well. I accepted Lackey's apology at face value. I don't really think that he meant harm and hopefully he'll pause and take thought before he speaks.

image lifted from Sports of Boston

Soapbox Time - 2012 edition

About once a year I get cranked up and jump on my soapbox. It is time. But not a time for chastisement. A time of celebration. A time to say, "Thank you." It has been over a year since I've had the need to call any of my fellow bloggers out on using the R-Word.  Thank you.

At the DSAG Buddy Walk

For those of you who are new to my blog or may not have delved deep enough into the archives, my daughter, Caroline, has Down syndrome. Down syndrome occurs when some or all of a person’s cells have an extra full or partial copy of the 21st chromosome. This additional genetic material alters the course of development.

Caroline and Edison

Caroline is in the first grade. She is mainstreamed in the public school, but does attend speech therapy. Last semester she made the honor roll. She has a great imagination and loves to read. She plays NASCAR with her Hot Wheels and blocks, will have tea parties with her dolls, has a 'boyfriend' at both school and church (yes, two different guys), the normal stuff.  She likes to watch her brother, Edison, play football and she likes to imitate the cheerleaders.  She doesn't like loud noises, likes routine, loves her daddy, and thinks she wants to go to church camp this summer so she can ride the zip-line.  Again, the normal stuff.

Respect

Many people, from all walks of life, feel the need to use the word, retard or retarded.  For me and my family it is a hurtful word.  It is not necessary.  I'd invite you to join with me in a show of respect and help end the use of the R-word.  Jump on over to r-word.org and sign the pledge not to use it.  This is not a guilt thing.  This is an encouraging thing.

Caroline and I thank you for supporting the R-word Awareness Day.

October is Down Syndrome Awareness Month

Since October of 1981, the Down syndrome community has been celebrating Down Syndrome Awareness Month.

The National Down Syndrome Society has issued a press release.  I share a part of it here:

This October, the National Down Syndrome Society (NDSS) invites the country to celebrate Down Syndrome Awareness Month in recognition of the many achievements and abilities of people with Down syndrome. 

Down syndrome is the most commonly occurring genetic condition, one in every 733 live births is a baby born with Down syndrome, and it is the most commonly occurring chromosomal condition. Advancements in education, research and advocacy have had a tremendous impact on the opportunities that individuals with Down syndrome have to live healthy and fulfilling lives. People with Down syndrome attend school, work, participate in decisions that affect them, and contribute to society in many wonderful ways.

I wrote a post last year about this time.  Similar post this time, with updated photos.

First day of school

Caroline is my daughter. She has Down syndrome. She's seven years old. She's in first grade and loves to read.  Last week she got a 111 on her written spelling test.  She knew all the words.  She got bonus points for using capitalization and punctuation correctly.

She's got a great sense of humor and loves to play pranks.  She's involved in the children's choir at church.  They're getting ready for their Christmas program.

She wants to play in the annual Hoops for Hope fundraiser for DSAG, but she's still too young.  This year, Pat Summit was able to attend part of the festivities, along with the Vols and Lady Vols basketball teams.

2011 Hoops for Hope

Yes, Greg, I included this shot for you.

Caroline as the Night Owl at the Knoxville Zoo

Caroline at a Smokies game

Caroline's best buddy, Grandma.  This was on the Fourth of July holiday.

Grandma and Caroline on Lake Loudon

Caroline at Emily's wedding

She's a normal kid.  Except that she has three copies of the 21st chromosome. On Sunday my family will be walking on her behalf at the Buddy Walk sponsored by the Down Syndrome Awareness Group of East Tennessee.

This is where I go all selfish dad-like. If you'd like to be a part of Caroline's team, please visit her pledge page.

I haven't had to climb up on my respect soapbox lately.  For that, I deeply thank you.

Respect

Yes, it is time for another one of my soapbox posts.

A.J. Burnett doesn't have respect.  LeBron James didn't have respect.  They both used the word retarded in a casual, demeaning way.

If you have followed my blog for some time you'll know that my daughter, Caroline, has Down syndrome.  I am her advocate.  When anyone uses the R-word in the manner that A.J. and LeBron did it hurts.  I'm speaking up.

After watching the video of LeBron's press conference I sent an email to the NBA...

In a recent post game interview, LeBron James is heard using the word "Retarded".

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rZCwb6Mf5aE

For people with intellectual disabilities (such as my daughter Caroline) and those that love them, hearing the R-word is hurtful.

I would encourage Mr. James to find a different outlet for his frustration. I would also ask that he visit http://r-word.org/ and make a pledge to stop using it altogether.

Thank you for a good product. Help make it better.

Regards,
Mark Aubrey

And a few days later I received a reply...

Dear Mark:

Thank you for contacting the National Basketball Association with your concerns regarding LeBron James’s use of the word “retarded” at the press conference following Game 3 of the Eastern Conference Semifinals. Following this incident, we communicated both our disappointment and yours to LeBron.

At the press conference following Game 4 of the Heat’s series with the Boston Celtics, LeBron apologized for his remarks.

Through our longstanding partnership with the Special Olympics, the NBA has embraced the organization’s Spread the Word to End the Word campaign, which is dedicated to eliminating the use of the words “retard” and “retarded.” Several NBA players, including Carmelo Anthony, Tyson Chandler, Dwight Howard, and Chris Paul have signed on to this campaign, and it is an important component of our NBA Cares initiative, which builds on the NBA's long tradition of addressing important social issues in the United States and around the world.

Sincerely,
NBA Fan Relations

I was encouraged by their response.

Below is a Public Service Announcement about ending the use of the R-word.  Please be advised that it contains contains language that others might find offensive or hurtful to make a point.





I'm stepping off of my soapbox for now.  Thanks for listening.

Down Syndrome Awareness Month

Down Syndrome Awareness Month is marked by national programs to promote awareness for the
abilities and achievements of those with Down syndrome.

  New York, NY  –  October 1, 2010. This October, the National Down Syndrome Society (NDSS) invites the country to celebrate Down Syndrome Awareness Month in recognition of the many achievements and abilities of  people with Down syndrome.   

  Down syndrome is the most commonly occurring genetic condition, one in every 733 live births is a baby born with Down syndrome, and it is the most commonly occurring chromosomal condition. Advancements in education, research and advocacy have had a tremendous impact on the opportunities that individuals with Down syndrome have to live healthy and fulfilling lives. People with Down syndrome attend school, work, participate  in decisions that affect them, and contribute to society in many wonderful ways.

The above is part of a press release from the NDSS.  I've stepped up on my soapbox before.  As of late, I haven't felt the need to.  For that, I thank you.

For those of you who haven't followed this blog for long, let me tell you the story of Caroline.  It won't take too long.

Caroline and her cardiologist, Dr. Jennings

Caroline is my daughter.  She has Down syndrome.  She's six years old.  She's got a great sense of humor and she's becoming very independent.  She's in kindergarten and loves to read.  She likes to attend her brother's football games.  At age five months she had surgery to repair her heart.  Just a few days before her sixth birthday she had to have her pacemaker replaced.  She enjoys playing with her dolls and blocks.  She can kick my butt in Wii bowling.  Her laugh is infectious.

Another photo with Dr. Jennings.  And Smokies' GM, Brian Cox

Next week my family will be walking in on her behalf at the Buddy Walk sponsored by the Down Syndrome Awareness Group of East Tennessee.

This is where I go all selfish dad-like.  If you'd like to be a part of Caroline's team, please visit her pledge page.



To watch a video about Caroline's story (and ours), please click here (a YouTube video that can't be embedded because of music copyright issues).

Caroline and Luke Sommer, pitcher in the Cubs organization

Thanks.

Ed McCaffrey

Ed McCaffrey was a wide receiver in the NFL, spending most of his playing years with the Denver Broncos. He was a Pro Bowler in 1998 and played in three Super Bowls.

I don't have his card. I lifted this one from an ebay auction. I'm blogging about him this morning because he's now an entrepreneur. He is a speaker, runs football camps and sells mustard. Yes, mustard.

He's sold a lot of this stuff. If you want some, go to PLBSports.com. They'll hook you up.

Back to the football camps. A lot of players lend their name to a camp. They'll show up, pass a few balls, pal around with the kids and head home. I hope that Ed does a bit more than that. Towards the end of June his camp is having a mini camp. It is the Dare to Play Football Camp for children and young adults with Down syndrome. Two days. He's also hosting a cheer leading camp for children and young adults with Down syndrome

I wish that Caroline was older and I wish that we were closer to Colorado. She'd enjoy participating in that. Either the football camp or the cheer leading camp. I'm not sure which one.

Spread the Word

Today is March 3rd, 2010. It is the day that Special Olympics is setting apart to focus on ending the R-Word. Retard. Retarded.

I have pledged before to help remove this word from everyday speech. It is a bit easier for me to try to do that. Some of you know about my daughter, Caroline. Caroline has Down syndrome. That is a genetic condition where she has three copies of the 21st chromosome. Clinically, she is mentally retarded.



Albert Pujols has a step-daughter with Down syndrome and he and his wife are very active in helping those with Down syndrome.



This is Caroline randomly posing for the camera about a month ago. This week she is getting ready for the state standardized tests. We're working on sight words and reading simple sentences. She can count to 100 by fives. She loves to color. She likes to watch Dora and Max & Ruby. She plays with her dolls and can kick my butt on some of the Wii games. She is in kindergarten, sharing time with her CDC and inclusion classes.



She is anything but retarded, in the casual (and callous) use of the word.

I've stepped up on this soapbox before. And I'll do it again. I'd encourage you to take the pledge at http://www.r-word.org.

I thank you. Caroline thanks you.

Cheers and Jeers

I think that TV Guide has a section called "Cheers and Jeers." They spotlight both the good and the bad in the industry that they cover.

I thought that I'd take a moment and do that for some of the blogs that I read.

Cheers:
Grand Cards had a very nice post on Tuesday about the Metrodome. I'll quote my favorite portion of it.

... the Metrodome claimed another victim tonight, in what was perhaps its shining moment. The secret is that the building's steel was forged by Lucifer himself and the dome is inflated by the last breaths of dying puppies and kittens. So, yes. The Metrodome wins again, and the Twins live to play another day.

Jeers:
I have a link on the sidebar for blogs I like to read. This last week I've removed three of them. The writers of those blogs used the word retard or retarded in a mocking way. They are very talented and generous people. But I don't like to or want to read their posts right now.

If you have read my blog for a while you know that my daughter, Caroline, has Down syndrome.
Down syndrome occurs when an individual has three, rather than two, copies of the 21st chromosome. This additional genetic material alters the course of development and causes the characteristics associated with Down syndrome. All people with Down syndrome experience cognitive delays, but the effect is usually mild to moderate and is not indicative of the many strengths and talents that each individual possesses. Caroline started kindergarten a few months ago. She is learning sight words, attempts to write her first name, speaks in complex sentences and is rather independent.

I think that the recent use of the r-word was used to denote a look or behavior that is clumsy, hapless and perhaps even hopeless. The word, used intentionally or not, conjures up a painful stereotype of people with intellectual disabilities. As Caroline's advocate, it hurts. In the past I have stepped up on a Soapbox, emailed people privately, commented publicly on comments, ignored it. Today I'm blogging about it again.

I respect the right for others to use whatever language they want. I have a right not to promote them. At this time I'm exercising that right. There are many good things happening now. I choose to focus on them.

Some resources about Ds and those with special needs can be found here:
* National Down Syndrome Society
* Special Olympics
* r-word.org

At the All-Star game, Major League Baseball teamed up with People magazine and showcased a number of individuals (All-Stars) that were making a difference in their communities. One of them was Brad Hennefer. Brad has Ds and his accomplishments at the game of golf inspired the Brad Hennefer Golf for Life Foundation, which provides golf opportunities for individuals with Ds. More info on Brad and the other All-Stars can be found at MLBgobeyond.com.

Soapbox

I need to climb up onto my soapbox for a moment. When I started this blog a few months ago it was my intent to stay away from hot-button topics. Politics. Religion. Even steroids. But I feel I need to bring a topic to light.

Reading the sports card blogs has opened my eyes to many things. Some wonderful, some, well, not so much. I have seen bloggers and those that comment use the word retard or retarded. I find this type of language hurtful and painful. I'm sure that those that say or write those words probably don't give it a second thought. It may just be part of their normal vocabulary.

My daughter, Caroline, has Down syndrome (Ds). She has an extra copy of the 21^st chromosome. Clinically she has mental retardation. I know that, but seeing the r-word used with such casualness is disturbing to me.

I would ask that the readers of this blog to take a moment to think before they speak (or write). Words are powerful tools. Please stop using this demeaning word. It isn't fair to those with intellectual disabilities.

There is a campaign underway to address this issue...

Some resources about Ds and those with special needs can be found here:
* National Down Syndrome Society
* Special Olympics
* r-word.org

The other night, Caroline had a fever. She couldn't sleep very well, so into daddy's chair we went. The World Baseball Classic was still in full swing. Japan was beating Cuba. Yoennis Cespedes had just dropped a fly ball and they were playing that clip over and over again. Caroline started to giggle and laugh. She thought that it was the greatest thing. Then she said, "C is for Caroline. Also for cat. And also for cookie." She saw the C on the hats of the Cuban players. She got it.

She likes to watch gymnastics on TV. We call it flip. When watching NASCAR she'll pump her fist in the air and say (to my wife's delight), "Go Jeff Burton. Go Junior." She loves to watch her older brother play middle school football. She can identify the letters on my Rockies T-shirt and will point to them and spell it out.

The other day I mentioned that Carl Erskine and I shared something. It is that we both have a child with Ds. Albert Pujols has a step-daughter with Ds. It isn't that uncommon.


This is Caroline...


So, as you speak or write and are tempted to use the r-word, think of Caroline. Think of me. Think of the 7 million people in America that have intellectual disabilities. Think about using a different word. I thank you. And they will, too.

I'm stepping off of my soapbox now.